The poor thing's head was hanging so far down that the stem was nearly bent. The rose's petals had a kind of sorry, sideways lean that made them look like the unhinged jaws of a snake dismally hoping for prey to cross its path. Surely it was doomed.
The other rose wasn't quite as bad. Its head was dipping, but the stem seemed strong and the petals were still neatly spiraled. It looked like it had a fairly good chance of surviving and reaching full bloom.
The roses were a special gift from the kids to Mark and me and we wanted to enjoy them as long as possible. I carefully arranged them in a vase, tenderly weaving them in among a bunch of miniature daisies and propping their heads against the stems of the stronger flowers.
I placed the base beneath the Virgin Mary's picture and sighed, "Sorry, Blessed Mother, I wanted to share them with you, but I guess I left them out of water too long and killed them.
I stepped back and examined my handiwork. Then I folded my arms and shook my head. "Mark? Do you think I should just toss them out? Especially that one; I doubt it'll spring back to life."
"Yeah, I would," he responded. "At least they were nice while they lasted."
I reached for the vase and then withdrew my hand. I just couldn't bring myself to throw the roses away - at least not yet, anyway. It was late in the evening and I decided that I'd leave them until morning to see what would happen.
"Well, Mother, it's up to you," I lamented as I went up to bed.
The next morning was such a flurry of activity that I almost forgot about the roses. We'd just gotten back from retreat, and there were tons of unpacking and reorganizing to do. As I passed to and fro, putting this and that away, I noticed the roses.
The one I had assumed was finished had flourished to the point of being even more vivacious than the other. It was truly beautiful! I stood there for a while, admiring it and thinking about its close call with the trashcan the night before. I had been ready to do away with it simply because it appeared to be hopelessly wilted.
Isn't that the way it is with so many of the people and situations in our lives? Aren't they also like a wilted rose?
When someone in whom we placed our hope and trust doesn't live up to our expectations, we assume there's no possibility of change. When a relationship becomes strained and difficult, we assume there's no chance of revival. When a situation is so complicated that we can't seem to keep our heads up, we assume it's time to trash the whole thing. Perhaps sometimes we're temtped to give up on ourselves because our stems seem far too bent.
That's when we have to turn to our Mother Mary. The Catechism of the Catholic Church tells us that she continually intercedes for us in all our needs. "Therefore the Blessed Virgin is invoked in the Church under the title of Advocate, Helper, Benefactress, and Mediatrix (CCC 969).
When we commit into her care the persons, relationships, and situations in our lives that seem doomed, she nurtures and restores them. When we commit into her care our needy and weak selves, she infuses us with grace and helps us to lift our heads again so we can continue blooming. If we entrust all to her, she assures us abundant fruitfulness even for the most wilted rose.
This column first appeared in the March issue of the Milwaukee Catholic Herald